Every other day, marriages are consummated between couples who say their vows and with time, renew them – when they think it’s necessary. New couples join the train, with the ‘till death do us part’ agreement very on their minds, hoping to be together the rest of their lives. But the reverse has mostly become the case as ‘perfect’ love turns sour, denying more marriages the experience of living the ‘happily forever’ dream.
When most couples say those words that are supposed to bind them together – irrespective of seemingly prevailing circumstances – and later on, they find out they can’t seem to get a hold of their marriage which might fast be heading for the rocks, they almost immediately are faced with the last option – divorce. Having lived within the comforts of the marital walls, it’s almost unbearable to come face to face with life outside of it. It is difficult –sometimes almost impossible – to remain whole after a divorce. The pain and heartache of losing the one you love far outweigh the benefits a divorce settlement can give you. Everyone is affected, children being the first. They come out of a broken home imbalanced for an extended period of their lives. They also tend to have a prejudiced perspective of love and life. In extreme cases, children blame their parents’ separation on themselves. This goes a long way in affecting a child psychologically and in how he relates with his peers. As he grows older, he might seek someone he can lean on who appears strong enough to shoulder him from future emotional distress and because the relationship isn’t one inspired out of love, it tends to break up, leaving him more broken. This can continue into marriage, with ugly memories and resolves about life trailing that poor individual.
The estranged couple is not left out of the trauma. It’s hard for them to reconcile their present state with the past. They feel hopes and aspirations conceived together are as good as dead. Not many couples totally survive the experience. Divorce isn’t ever a best option. It destabilizes your lives and you’re never the same after. Never.
If you are on the brink of divorce, you need to stop a moment to think about it. Is it really worth it? Could you both have a better life together? Do you really, really think you deserve to live without each other? Have you thought about your children – and if you don’t have any – have you thought about life together as a couple? You can work it out. If you were happy once, you can be happy again. Think about what might be tearing you two apart. Is it an unforgivable sin? Well, I’d say you forgive. You have to remember with love comes forgiveness. It’s easier to forgive than to go through aches and pains all your life. The aftermath of a divorce drain you emotionally, financially – especially if you have to cater for yourself and the kids almost all by yourself now – and psychologically. You don’t want to go through all that. No. Half the marriages that are consummated today end up in divorce. You don’t want to be in the number or add up to the statistics. It’s important to consider your options – while you still have them – than make a decision you might live to regret the whole of your life. Life is beautiful and successful marriages are a part of what makes it interesting. Believe that and start to see the many reasons why your marriage should survive and start to work at it.