The Diary Series

Dear Diary,
Today is the best day of my life. The sky is blue and life is suddenly good. And why shouldn’t it be? I’m in love! Yeah, I know, right; it feels good. Have you ever felt this way before? Yeah, I shouldn’t ask! I finally, finally am in love with someone who loves me back. You can’t imagine how wonderful that is. I know. Again. You might wonder why I seem so excited. Shouldn’t it be one of those good things of life? Oh well, you should wonder, I’ll tell you. As always.
Let me take you down memory lane a little. Remember when I was in high school? When I told you about that guy I had a huge, huge crush on? Oh well, it didn’t work out. Work out? Did he even ever notice me? Know that I did exist? It’s his loss. Their loss. The loss of every one of them who didn’t think me fit to be their girlfriend!
The first guy I thought I liked: Brian. Oh, yeah? It turned out he had no brains! At all. It was close to Valentine then and every lover boy was pulling or thinking about the most dramatically romantic love stunts they’d each pull. Especially ones that will eventually outshine their fellow lover boy. And the girls? Those silly lazy heads. All they did was daydream about the stupid ‘special’ presents they were going to receive. Not to mention their dumb cliché annual night outs! So sick!
Yes, I say this again without any apologies. Those arranged shows were the stupidest, sickest and outrageously lame things anyone could think of as the perfect activity on Valentine’s Day. Especially the presents! Of course they had to be cos I never was a part of those stupid love games. At least I tried to be. Or maybe I was too mature for them. Yeah, right! But honestly, dear Diary, I craved, longed for, desperately needed someone to love me. Someone. Anyone. Well, anyone handsome. And romantic. Who wouldn’t bother about my fast depreciating social life (like I had any) but just love me for who I was and wasn’t. I just needed someone that came close to looking a little like the man of my dreams. From the school head boy (oh, gracious! he was and still is drop dead gorgeous!!!!!!!!) to the class rep in the Arts department in the first senior year to the most handsome guy in my class! I heard that one got hooked to some girl he detests (how’s that?). Not my problem. Serves him… whatever! Best. As if! I never did get anyone of them at the different times I secretly admired them. And I couldn’t care less. Well, as if! Again.
Okay, back to the Valentine stories and quit concentrating on them losers. This particular Valentine, I wasn’t going to be left out. One of the very romantic trends then was for the guy to send the gifts to their girlfriends through a junior student. How so lame! The girlfriends did send theirs too, somehow. And they would have notes in the packs to state where to meet. Asides, the fact that I was a geek and had no sociable friends; I didn’t have any grand idea about what to give to a guy on Valentine’s Day so I bought plastic roses. Those were very cliché and almost natural of anyone to do. I managed to send them to him – Brian – with a note that said some crap like: From your loving secret admirer. I hope you love me back. Now, every time I think about it, I feel really foolish. I didn’t get a reply or thank you note or anything to say he wasn’t meeting me. Or that he was. How so gentlemanly! Huh! The next morning, my heart sank real deep. I saw him making out with some girl in an empty class. What, he didn’t get my note? Of course, he did! I tried, at least. I tried to be liked and have someone I could call my own too but I guess I didn’t succeed at it. That’s the only thing I failed at in high school. Except of course that a hunk knew I had a crush on him. Big crush. You see, my crushes are always huge. Maybe it’s because I give a great deal of myself into anything I think is worth it. And what do I get in return? N-o-t-h-i-n-g!!!! So again, Hunk never asked me out. He probably didn’t feel the same way I felt about him. So much for love!
So don’t blame me when I say today is a beautiful love story. Today is the day that I sing that beautiful love song because I not only have Mr. Right with me, he’s the perfect one! I sing my song because life is truly beautiful and you only get the chance to live once. So why not live it to the fullest, happy and in love?! That’s my mantra. *Wink wink*

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